# Did your child's autism diagnosis make you wonder about yourself?

> Why many parents recognize autistic traits in themselves after a child's diagnosis, and what you can do with that feeling.

URL: https://theautismkit.com/guides/am-i-autistic-too
By The Autism Kit team · Reviewed by [BCBA NAME], BCBA · Updated 2026-09-27

**Short answer:** It's very common. Autism runs in families, and genes explain most of the likelihood of autism, so many parents recognize some of their child's traits in themselves. Having some traits doesn't mean you're autistic. If it's affecting your life or you want to know, a psychologist or psychiatrist who assesses adults can help.

**Key takeaways**
- **Many parents** recognize autistic traits in themselves after a child's diagnosis.
- That's because autism **often runs in families**.
- Some traits **don't mean** you're autistic.
- If you want to know, an **adult assessment** is possible at any age.

## Why do so many parents wonder about themselves?

Because autism often runs in families. A study of more than 2 million people estimated that about 80% of the likelihood of autism comes from genes.[1] Having a brother, sister or parent who is autistic makes autism more likely.[2]

So when you read about your child's diagnosis, some descriptions might sound very familiar: needing routine, finding small talk tiring, strong reactions to noise, or deep focus on interests.

## Does having some traits mean I'm autistic?

Not necessarily. Many relatives of autistic people have a few traits without being autistic. A diagnosis depends on whether differences in social communication and repetitive behaviors or interests have been present since childhood and affect your daily life.

It's also common for these feelings to come up during a stressful time. A new diagnosis can bring up a lot about your own childhood.

**You're not the cause.** Even if you share traits with your child, you didn't cause their autism by parenting a certain way. Genes and brain
  development before birth are the main factors.
  [3]

## How do adults get assessed?

Adult assessments are usually done by a psychologist or psychiatrist with experience in adult autism. They often involve:

- Interviews about your childhood and current life
- Questionnaires about social communication, routines and senses
- Sometimes, talking with someone who knew you as a child

Adult assessments can be harder to find than children's. Ask your own doctor for a referral, or search for psychologists who specialize in adult autism.

## Would knowing help me?

Many autistic parents say knowing helped them:

- Understand their own needs, like quiet time or clear plans
- Explain themselves to partners, family or work
- Feel more connected with their child

Others decide not to seek a diagnosis and simply use what they've learned. Both are valid choices.

**Your needs count too.** Routines and visual plans that help your child can help you too. It's OK to build in quiet time and clear plans for
  yourself.

**Talk to your own doctor if....** you're feeling overwhelmed, anxious or low. Caring for yourself is part of caring for your child.

Free printable: [Free printable: appointment notes](https://theautismkit.com/printables/appointment-notes.pdf)

## What can I do next?

- [ ] Write down the traits you recognize in yourself
- [ ] Talk with someone you trust about how you're feeling
- [ ] Ask your doctor about an adult assessment if you want one
- [ ] Build one quiet, predictable moment into your own day

Read next: [What causes autism?](https://theautismkit.com/guides/what-causes-autism)

## Common questions

### Can adults be diagnosed with autism?

Yes. Adults can be assessed by psychologists, psychiatrists or other clinicians with experience in adult autism. It usually involves interviews about your childhood and current life, and questionnaires.

### Do I need a diagnosis?

Not necessarily. Some adults find a diagnosis helps them understand themselves and get support at work. Others find that learning about autism is enough. It's your choice.

### Will it affect my child if I'm autistic too?

Many autistic parents say it helps them understand their child. What matters most is support for both of you.

## Sources

1. Sandin S, et al. The heritability of autism spectrum disorder. JAMA, 2017. https://doi.org/10.1001/jama.2017.12141
2. National Institute of Mental Health: Autism spectrum disorder. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/autism-spectrum-disorder
3. NICHD (NIH): What causes autism? https://www.nichd.nih.gov/health/topics/autism/conditioninfo/causes

General guidance, not a diagnosis or treatment plan. Talk with your pediatrician or a developmental specialist about your child's care.